June 21st was the longest day of the year, the first official day of summer, and the unofficial start of what the Dutch jokingly call, “Komkommertijd” (Cucumber season), when society slows to a languid, summer holiday-like pace and national news is generally as interesting and dynamic as a cucumber.
Hence, yesterday’s ANP news headline: “One-third of all highway restaurants judged “unsatisfactory” in quality test”. Of greater importance to 70,000 Dutch military employees is Defense Minister Henk Kamp’s plan to cut 9,000 jobs. Elsewhere, 600 refugee center employees will lose their jobs when 37 refugee centers are closed in the coming year. Strict new asylum rules mean fewer asylum seekers are allowed into Holland. Inflation was up 2.3% in May, with products like potatoes, eggs and fish costing 40-80% more. Chairman of the employer’s organization VNO-NCW, J. Schraven, called for a return of the 40-hour working week, claiming it’s needed to improve economic competitiveness and compensate for a rapidly aging workforce. Premier Balkenende wants a return of the ”oranje gevoel” (royal national pride) in politics. He also wants citizens and organizations to take the responsibility for pulling Holland out of its economic decline by accepting ‘painful’ cuts in health-care and social services. The Dutch Royal Family announced that Crown Prince Willem-Alexander’s wife, Princess Maxima, is pregnant. Premier Balkenende declared that Maxima’s father, Jorge Zorreguieta, is welcome to attend the eventual birth and baptism in Holland. Balkenende said: ”When it comes to childbirth or other pressing family matters, you should prevent it from happening that people are not present.” Zorreguieta, a minister in the brutal dictatorship that ruled Argentina in the 1970s and ‘disappeared’ (i.e. murdered) thousands of Argentineans, was prevented from attending his daughter’s royal wedding in Holland last year. A new study found that rates of HIV infection and other sexually-transmitted diseases are rising so ”explosively” in Holland that comparisons are being made with the 1980s, before nationwide AIDS-awareness campaigns began. Last year, cases of HIV-infection doubled, while cases of syphilis rose 78%, with young women between 15 and 19-years-old forming the highest-risk group. Four people in Hoenderloo reported seeing a body falling from the sky. Police have yet to find a body and say it may have been a stowaway who fell from a plane when the landing gear was lowered. June 21st was “International Boy Love Day”. Pedophiles met in secret locations in Holland and Belgium to discuss their love of boys aged 6 to 15-years-old. Organizers said ”it’s about the aesthetic of the child, their beauty, wonder, enthusiasm. It’s not a cover for the sexual feelings we have for boys.” Nevertheless, the meetings’ locations were kept secret ”to avoid confrontations with people wielding baseball bats.” And finally, members of the Dutch Parliament were presented with a 2-meter tall penis, sent to them by the National Student Union (LSVb). The penis (in Dutch lul) was accompanied by a message echoing the words of a former Dutch Minister of Housing: “In gelul kun je niet wonen” (loosely translated, ‘You can’t live in bullshit empty talk.’). The student union is demanding an end to student-housing shortages.
June 21st was the longest day of the year, the first official day of summer, and the unofficial start of what the Dutch jokingly call, “Komkommertijd” (Cucumber season), when society slows to a languid, summer holiday-like pace and national news is generally as interesting and dynamic as a cucumber. Hence, yesterday’s ANP news headline: “One-third of all highway restaurants judged “unsatisfactory” in quality test”. Of greater importance to 70,000 Dutch military employees is Defense Minister Henk Kamp’s plan to cut 9,000 jobs. Elsewhere, 600 refugee center employees will lose their jobs when 37 refugee centers are closed in the coming year. Strict new asylum rules mean fewer asylum seekers are allowed into Holland. Inflation was up 2.3% in May, with products like potatoes, eggs and fish costing 40-80% more. Chairman of the employer’s organization VNO-NCW, J. Schraven, called for a return of the 40-hour working week, claiming it’s needed to improve economic competitiveness and compensate for a rapidly aging workforce. Premier Balkenende wants a return of the ”oranje gevoel” (royal national pride) in politics. He also wants citizens and organizations to take the responsibility for pulling Holland out of its economic decline by accepting ‘painful’ cuts in health-care and social services. The Dutch Royal Family announced that Crown Prince Willem-Alexander’s wife, Princess Maxima, is pregnant. Premier Balkenende declared that Maxima’s father, Jorge Zorreguieta, is welcome to attend the eventual birth and baptism in Holland. Balkenende said: ”When it comes to childbirth or other pressing family matters, you should prevent it from happening that people are not present.” Zorreguieta, a minister in the brutal dictatorship that ruled Argentina in the 1970s and ‘disappeared’ (i.e. murdered) thousands of Argentineans, was prevented from attending his daughter’s royal wedding in Holland last year. A new study found that rates of HIV infection and other sexually-transmitted diseases are rising so ”explosively” in Holland that comparisons are being made with the 1980s, before nationwide AIDS-awareness campaigns began. Last year, cases of HIV-infection doubled, while cases of syphilis rose 78%, with young women between 15 and 19-years-old forming the highest-risk group. Four people in Hoenderloo reported seeing a body falling from the sky. Police have yet to find a body and say it may have been a stowaway who fell from a plane when the landing gear was lowered. June 21st was “International Boy Love Day”. Pedophiles met in secret locations in Holland and Belgium to discuss their love of boys aged 6 to 15-years-old. Organizers said ”it’s about the aesthetic of the child, their beauty, wonder, enthusiasm. It’s not a cover for the sexual feelings we have for boys.” Nevertheless, the meetings’ locations were kept secret ”to avoid confrontations with people wielding baseball bats.” And finally, members of the Dutch Parliament were presented with a 2-meter tall penis, sent to them by the National Student Union (LSVb). The penis (in Dutch lul) was accompanied by a message echoing the words of a former Dutch Minister of Housing: “In gelul kun je niet wonen” (loosely translated, ‘You can’t live in bullshit empty talk.’). The student union is demanding an end to student-housing shortages.
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