“You’ll have a new Dutch boyfriend within two weeks for sure,” one of my closet girlfriends Jie said to me before I left China for Holland. “But be careful with them, their love is intense but short.”
Is that true? I really don’t know…because nothing romantic or sexy has happened to me since I arrived in the Netherlands seven months ago. And it seems like my mother has asked me the same question hundreds of times since: “Honey, any romance?” But every time I just have to disappoint her again and again by replying, “Nope, nothing….” But I can’t understand why not, after all, I’m pretty, smart, easy going…so why am I still alone, while every one of my former classmates back in China seems to have found one or another boyfriend? I’m not sure what’s going with you young Dutch guys, or the students in TU Delft in general for that matter, because in China it’s quite common to see student couples on campus, walking hand-in-hand, sitting side-by-side in the library and even kissing mouth-to-mouth outside the girls’ dormitory before the dormitory door closes for the night at midnight. I mean, there are even signs saying ‘NO FEEDING’ on Chinese university canteen tables! But here in TU Delft, everything’s quite different. I’ve got classmates here who are dating each other, everybody knows they’re a couple, but you never see them together on campus! While on the hand, I have a male and female classmate who are always together, do everything together, even stayed in the same hotel room when we went on a class trip, yet he’s married and she has a boyfriend! Strange…
Everybody here’s so damn busy with their own business…fast walking, fast talking, fast eating (two pieces of bread with a slice of cheese in between, eaten on the train?)…even fast fucking? Maybe it’s just that young people nowadays, boys and girls, are all afraid of getting involved in a relationship or having to make some kind of commitment? “Can I still travel around the world for eight months if I have a boyfriend?” an Australian classmate said, sharing her worries with me. Young people love to live this fast way of life nowadays, so what Dutch guy will to spend months romancing a Chinese girl? Although it’s true that there are some ‘fast’ Chinese girls, like Mu Zimei, who wrote about her sexy experiences with 52 guys, it’s still the case in China that most Chinese girls are very conventional…there’s normally no chance for a guy to bring a Chinese girl back home to bed after one hour of chatting in a bar! Dating first before starting a relationship, rather than first having sex together, is still the norm. So boys, if you got your eye on an Asian princess, first invite her out for dinner…or even better, to a Chinese restaurant…buy her some flowers…show your interest in learning Chinese and ask her to teach you some. Remember, Chinese girls are normally not willing to approach a guy first. Generally, we’re pretty shy, waiting for the guy to make the first move, so it’s you who has to take the first step forward. And be patient, give her enough time to get to know you better. She’ll probably need more time than a western girl. And then do your thing…make love to her in your intensive Dutch way…just don’t end it so quickly!
‘Asian Girl’ Yi Ya’s next column will appear in Delta 16.
“You’ll have a new Dutch boyfriend within two weeks for sure,” one of my closet girlfriends Jie said to me before I left China for Holland. “But be careful with them, their love is intense but short.” Is that true? I really don’t know…because nothing romantic or sexy has happened to me since I arrived in the Netherlands seven months ago. And it seems like my mother has asked me the same question hundreds of times since: “Honey, any romance?” But every time I just have to disappoint her again and again by replying, “Nope, nothing….” But I can’t understand why not, after all, I’m pretty, smart, easy going…so why am I still alone, while every one of my former classmates back in China seems to have found one or another boyfriend? I’m not sure what’s going with you young Dutch guys, or the students in TU Delft in general for that matter, because in China it’s quite common to see student couples on campus, walking hand-in-hand, sitting side-by-side in the library and even kissing mouth-to-mouth outside the girls’ dormitory before the dormitory door closes for the night at midnight. I mean, there are even signs saying ‘NO FEEDING’ on Chinese university canteen tables! But here in TU Delft, everything’s quite different. I’ve got classmates here who are dating each other, everybody knows they’re a couple, but you never see them together on campus! While on the hand, I have a male and female classmate who are always together, do everything together, even stayed in the same hotel room when we went on a class trip, yet he’s married and she has a boyfriend! Strange…
Everybody here’s so damn busy with their own business…fast walking, fast talking, fast eating (two pieces of bread with a slice of cheese in between, eaten on the train?)…even fast fucking? Maybe it’s just that young people nowadays, boys and girls, are all afraid of getting involved in a relationship or having to make some kind of commitment? “Can I still travel around the world for eight months if I have a boyfriend?” an Australian classmate said, sharing her worries with me. Young people love to live this fast way of life nowadays, so what Dutch guy will to spend months romancing a Chinese girl? Although it’s true that there are some ‘fast’ Chinese girls, like Mu Zimei, who wrote about her sexy experiences with 52 guys, it’s still the case in China that most Chinese girls are very conventional…there’s normally no chance for a guy to bring a Chinese girl back home to bed after one hour of chatting in a bar! Dating first before starting a relationship, rather than first having sex together, is still the norm. So boys, if you got your eye on an Asian princess, first invite her out for dinner…or even better, to a Chinese restaurant…buy her some flowers…show your interest in learning Chinese and ask her to teach you some. Remember, Chinese girls are normally not willing to approach a guy first. Generally, we’re pretty shy, waiting for the guy to make the first move, so it’s you who has to take the first step forward. And be patient, give her enough time to get to know you better. She’ll probably need more time than a western girl. And then do your thing…make love to her in your intensive Dutch way…just don’t end it so quickly!
‘Asian Girl’ Yi Ya’s next column will appear in Delta 16.
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